I love this piece, JB. I've been married to a bloke for 30 years who has stayed home and looked after the kids - devoted his life to me, them and his cause of environmental activism. He's the toughest/ softest bloke I know. At 65, mixes it with the young guns in the surf at North Narra ( short board); tears it up on the ski field with our 27 yo son; cries at romantic movies with our 25 yo daughter; brings flowers every other day. Does all that 'bloke stuff' of getting up on the roof in the rain and clearing the gutters etc. He's a sentimental fool and, I think, an ornament to all things truly 'masculine'. Secure in his own knowledge of what it is to be a 'man'. Never felt overshadowed by me - and is my greatest supporter. Together we strike a great balance and have created a lucky life. AND ... (controversial point) he has never been my 'best friend'... I have others for that. And many of his best friends are women he loves to spend time with.
He remains my lover and a never-ending enigma of a human. One hundred percent all MAN. x
Why is it with the obscenely reich (sic) fucks its always buy twitter, fly into space, buy the US government or colonise Mars instead of end world hunger, defeat global warming or provide kids everywhere books (love your work Ms Parton)
Sadly we’re all down here in reality land hoping that one day the chorus of “the emperor has no clothes” will finally get into peoples brains. I didn’t really think the world would be brought to ruin by silly little scared boys, but here we are. Great piece, John
As I have watched the world implode in the Social Media Era, dominated by these baby-chicken man-boys with tiny peens, all I see over and over again is supposed "men" who never emotionally matured beyond age 13. Fake-tough, cringeworthy, sad little piglets craving the approval of their Boomer fathers and grandfathers, some of whom actually embodied real masculinity through duty, honour and sacrifice.
Somehow the worst of us always end up in charge of the rest. That's something humanity really needs to sort out if we want to make it out of this century.
Golly - 60 years ago I succumbed to the advertising telling me my skinny frame needed muscles for the beach - and I ordered one of those Chest-expanders. I soon lost interest. And never regained it - I knew I'd been had. But this essay JB is so clear - it brought my juvenile idiocy straight back into memory - but it's with a fond smile that I look back at that reflection of naïvety! Musk's salute however is really a kiddie's fist-pump, a high-five - nothing of substance except to demonstrate a clever but culturally and socially immature soul.
You are very generous to a former kid - it was undoubtedly in some such place - possibly images in the advertising - of a skinny guy having sand kicked in his face?
That means the one advertisement was a real gift to the client who commissioned it - given your relative youthfulness to my relative old age! It kept on working...
Worth the wait. The taint of the “manosphere” is oppressive and seemingly ubiquitous on social media platforms. But I refuse to cede ground. I’m dug in. Not to change their minds. No. I already have a full slate of lost causes and I’m done doing their emotional labour.
I’m dug I’m for others not yet swallowed by this needy thing. Because we can’t survive this on our own.
Nothing like a good dose of the wit and wisdom of JB to make the day better. The Neo-alpha-bros are an unhappy lot, but they do provide excellent life lessons, including proof that wealth, power and success aren't the keys to peace of mind and to a good life. We all want to feel loved, respected. and admired, to go to sleep at night content, to feel that we matter. Being an alpha-bro probably won't get you there, at least not in a lasting way. It's like people who tell themselves they'd be happy if only they had more money, then win the lottery, and are even more unhappy, because they've been deprived of the false hope that more money would make them happy..
This is great. I just want to comment on one line in particular.
"I think it’s that idea of a comprehensible pecking order, a power structure, whatever you want to call it, that sits at the heart of the new masculinity that whispers so loudly to these guys."
The funny thing is that - as someone of Musk's age - if I spoke to my friends on the topic of "pecking orders", the consensus would be that pecking orders suck a multitude, and maybe it's better to leave other people happy than rule over them. "Pecking orders" are the sort of stuff that people have bad remembrances from school, and are happy to be rid of them. Who really gets off that shit?
I never thought we’d get to this either. The line “while we were sleeping” comes to mind.
Is that how the word “woke” became a thing? These creepy fucks have crept into power by disguising instant access to converse with other people anywhere in the world as a good thing?
The potential for social media being a force for good hasn’t materialised. When people realised it had been hijacked to spread misinformation and started challenging that, they were vilified and attacked.
These whiny little megalomaniacs control the narrative wherever they can, be on their platforms, or in old school media. Speak of the naked Emperors and your post disappears, or you get eliminated (banned).
Now we’re in a war, and the irony of the sleepwalkers and their controllers using the word “woke” as an insult is a perfect example of the upside down world we live in now.
Sometimes the people on the frontline fighting for truth must feel like Neo, but where’s our Morpheus?when we need him.
As usual, loved the piece. One correction: Rupert does not own the FT. He owns the Wall St Journal. The FT is owned by Nikkei, as in the index. As Japanese as Toyota.
Appropriate to both book clubbing and masculinity, I've just read Lightning Rods by Helen Dewitt one of the funniest and most outrageous books ever. Where the stupidest aspects of masculinity and problematic male sexuality are exposed and, a solution to the problem even more outrageously stupid is proposed - and delivered. Vicious, hilarious, incredible.
I've recently kinda realised that the binding force between all these ' alpha male ' types is that they are stuck in that teenage boy dilemma of wanting to be grown up, but not wanting to give up their childhoods - wanting all the freedoms that come with being an adult, but none of the responsibilities - it's rule by immaturity ( especially in the current US ' administration ' ).
Teenage boys are the sweetest things on earth, but they have to grow up, while maintaining their sweetness - it's not easy, & that's kinda the point ❤️
I love this piece, JB. I've been married to a bloke for 30 years who has stayed home and looked after the kids - devoted his life to me, them and his cause of environmental activism. He's the toughest/ softest bloke I know. At 65, mixes it with the young guns in the surf at North Narra ( short board); tears it up on the ski field with our 27 yo son; cries at romantic movies with our 25 yo daughter; brings flowers every other day. Does all that 'bloke stuff' of getting up on the roof in the rain and clearing the gutters etc. He's a sentimental fool and, I think, an ornament to all things truly 'masculine'. Secure in his own knowledge of what it is to be a 'man'. Never felt overshadowed by me - and is my greatest supporter. Together we strike a great balance and have created a lucky life. AND ... (controversial point) he has never been my 'best friend'... I have others for that. And many of his best friends are women he loves to spend time with.
He remains my lover and a never-ending enigma of a human. One hundred percent all MAN. x
This was lovely to read, mate. Thx.
BTW - I'm the one who "grinds" on WoW and Diablo in this house!
This is the way.
I love this beautiful story. When you’re with the right person, your person, you do indeed create your own luck.
That was simply wonderful to read.
Why is it with the obscenely reich (sic) fucks its always buy twitter, fly into space, buy the US government or colonise Mars instead of end world hunger, defeat global warming or provide kids everywhere books (love your work Ms Parton)
What I’d give to make ending world hunger or properly universal healthcare a flex instead of colonising Mars 🙄
Sadly we’re all down here in reality land hoping that one day the chorus of “the emperor has no clothes” will finally get into peoples brains. I didn’t really think the world would be brought to ruin by silly little scared boys, but here we are. Great piece, John
Go back 3 generations and the world was run, badly, by wealth and position and the most ruthless of the robber barons.
Tug your forelock or be punished.
We forgot the lessons our grandparents learned and let the bastards back in.
We were warned in the 70's and ignored it.
As I have watched the world implode in the Social Media Era, dominated by these baby-chicken man-boys with tiny peens, all I see over and over again is supposed "men" who never emotionally matured beyond age 13. Fake-tough, cringeworthy, sad little piglets craving the approval of their Boomer fathers and grandfathers, some of whom actually embodied real masculinity through duty, honour and sacrifice.
Somehow the worst of us always end up in charge of the rest. That's something humanity really needs to sort out if we want to make it out of this century.
Golly - 60 years ago I succumbed to the advertising telling me my skinny frame needed muscles for the beach - and I ordered one of those Chest-expanders. I soon lost interest. And never regained it - I knew I'd been had. But this essay JB is so clear - it brought my juvenile idiocy straight back into memory - but it's with a fond smile that I look back at that reflection of naïvety! Musk's salute however is really a kiddie's fist-pump, a high-five - nothing of substance except to demonstrate a clever but culturally and socially immature soul.
Wait. Did you order yours out the back of the comic? That’s where I got mine?
You are very generous to a former kid - it was undoubtedly in some such place - possibly images in the advertising - of a skinny guy having sand kicked in his face?
I remember the advert
That means the one advertisement was a real gift to the client who commissioned it - given your relative youthfulness to my relative old age! It kept on working...
"...When kicked to the ground.
Then soon in the gym
with a determined chin.
The sweat from his pores as he works for his cause.....". sorry off to watch Rocky Horror before its banned in the US.
Really great, loving these pieces
Worth the wait. The taint of the “manosphere” is oppressive and seemingly ubiquitous on social media platforms. But I refuse to cede ground. I’m dug in. Not to change their minds. No. I already have a full slate of lost causes and I’m done doing their emotional labour.
I’m dug I’m for others not yet swallowed by this needy thing. Because we can’t survive this on our own.
Nothing like a good dose of the wit and wisdom of JB to make the day better. The Neo-alpha-bros are an unhappy lot, but they do provide excellent life lessons, including proof that wealth, power and success aren't the keys to peace of mind and to a good life. We all want to feel loved, respected. and admired, to go to sleep at night content, to feel that we matter. Being an alpha-bro probably won't get you there, at least not in a lasting way. It's like people who tell themselves they'd be happy if only they had more money, then win the lottery, and are even more unhappy, because they've been deprived of the false hope that more money would make them happy..
This is great. I just want to comment on one line in particular.
"I think it’s that idea of a comprehensible pecking order, a power structure, whatever you want to call it, that sits at the heart of the new masculinity that whispers so loudly to these guys."
The funny thing is that - as someone of Musk's age - if I spoke to my friends on the topic of "pecking orders", the consensus would be that pecking orders suck a multitude, and maybe it's better to leave other people happy than rule over them. "Pecking orders" are the sort of stuff that people have bad remembrances from school, and are happy to be rid of them. Who really gets off that shit?
People who think they will be at the type of the order
People always think they would have been the kings and lords in feudal times - when of course they would have been the peasants
Both my parents are quite into family history, so I have no such illusions: it's peasants 20 generations down on both sides
We're WAY over this compensating crap, well said. Love your work.
I never thought we’d get to this either. The line “while we were sleeping” comes to mind.
Is that how the word “woke” became a thing? These creepy fucks have crept into power by disguising instant access to converse with other people anywhere in the world as a good thing?
The potential for social media being a force for good hasn’t materialised. When people realised it had been hijacked to spread misinformation and started challenging that, they were vilified and attacked.
These whiny little megalomaniacs control the narrative wherever they can, be on their platforms, or in old school media. Speak of the naked Emperors and your post disappears, or you get eliminated (banned).
Now we’re in a war, and the irony of the sleepwalkers and their controllers using the word “woke” as an insult is a perfect example of the upside down world we live in now.
Sometimes the people on the frontline fighting for truth must feel like Neo, but where’s our Morpheus?when we need him.
As usual, loved the piece. One correction: Rupert does not own the FT. He owns the Wall St Journal. The FT is owned by Nikkei, as in the index. As Japanese as Toyota.
Ah, of course! He owns the times in London. I conflated the two and I have to confess I’ve been doing it for years Thanks for the pick up
Appropriate to both book clubbing and masculinity, I've just read Lightning Rods by Helen Dewitt one of the funniest and most outrageous books ever. Where the stupidest aspects of masculinity and problematic male sexuality are exposed and, a solution to the problem even more outrageously stupid is proposed - and delivered. Vicious, hilarious, incredible.
"But it looks nice. Nicer than contemplating reality, at any rate" by that metric so does Dante's Inferno.
I've recently kinda realised that the binding force between all these ' alpha male ' types is that they are stuck in that teenage boy dilemma of wanting to be grown up, but not wanting to give up their childhoods - wanting all the freedoms that come with being an adult, but none of the responsibilities - it's rule by immaturity ( especially in the current US ' administration ' ).
Teenage boys are the sweetest things on earth, but they have to grow up, while maintaining their sweetness - it's not easy, & that's kinda the point ❤️